From My Drawing Pad

"Melinda at the window"
I haven't drawn in a long time. I did this today. It's a scene from my manuscript, that got stuck in my head.

For the Love of All Things Crispy, Don't Call Me Ma'am

I’m gonna let you in on a secret -- just between you and me.
Ugh, I can’t believe I’m doing this.
Here goes ...
I
am
getting
older.
What, you’re not surprised? Well I am. Quite frankly, I’m pissed off!
I’ve had issues with my age ever since my 26th birthday.
Why 26? Because I was no longer in my early 20’s.

And don’t get me started on the irrational emotions on the eve of my 40th!
Can you say insane? Well, I know my family can.
Then the unthinkable happened.
Three days before my birthday I was in a department store and a sales lady stepped in front of me to show me “wrinkle cream for around the eyes.”
Then, because of the tears, she didn’t think “the cream would be very effective.”
Great! Now what do you have for red puffy eyes?

My 42nd birthday is coming up, and still, I continue to be amazed when people don’t think I’m 24. Why is that?
Last week I went to a department store for a mini makeover. I thought it would be fun -- I guess this time I set myself up for the disappointment.
I asked the girl, “What moisturizer do you recommend to help prevent fine lines? I’m starting to get a little crease between the brows.”
She pulled out a product and began raving about the cream as she applied it, saying, “My mom has that crease, and I told her …”
Her voice trailed off, as it was now drowned out by my own voice screaming in my head.
Mom! Did she just compare me to her mother? Oh my god! How old is this girl? How old is her mother?
I began to rationalize in my head.
Maybe she is, like, er, I don't know, 20. Okay … I guess, I could be her mother. Maybe her mother is young and looks great. But still, NOT cool.
Let me just say: I’m not good at guessing a person’s age. I later found out that she is married with two kids.

Sorry, I'm trying to get to the point.
As I look around, it seems to me that many of my peers are growing old “gracefully.” They seem comfortable with themselves –- even embracing their age and maturity. They act like moms, with their schedules and routines and stuff.
I’ve never been any good at that. I’m laid back. I like to fool around, make jokes, and act crazy with my kids. I listen to Radio Disney when the kids aren't in the car.
I love Wizards of Waverly Place, Hannah Montana, Jonas, Phineas & Ferb, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Suite Life, and iCarly. (Yes, I like TV.)

The long and the short of it, is this: I refuse to grow up. I won’t do it.

Kids...

I had my 2 year old niece, Alison, at my house for about an hour the other day. I was babysitting – with the help of my 12 year old daughter. Why did I need help? Because Alison is fast! That kid could get into a room, find something to grab and be gone in an instant. So, I had my daughter on “shadow” duty.

Alison had gotten into the nativity scene, which by the way is the most religious thing in our house.

As Alison's father was walking in the door to pick her up, I, just so happened to be running through, yelling, “I found Jesus!"
My brother-in-law thought that I'd had some religious awakening. "Huh?"
"No, I literally found Jesus," I said holding out my hand.

People are always saying, “Kids says darnedest things.” Well, I think that they also make adults say some wacky things.
Parents, think about it. How many times have you said something to your child that you never thought you would have to say?
For example:
-No, that’s not a sandbox! That’s where the kitty poops.
-Why did you write “Joe” across your little sister’s forehead IN PERMANENT MARKER!

I would love hear some your funny kid stories.

Happy New Year!

I am so excited about 2010. I have plans and goals, and sadly I feel like this is a first for me.
I feel like I’ve gone through most of my life being clueless.
Just like my 16th birthday, when my mom, with the help of my best friend, threw me a surprise party. Not only did I not pick up on the numerous slip ups by invitees, but I kept thinking we were all going to a school dance.
Then there was the unexpected, “Let’s leave early and go to the mall before the dance,” my friend said.
Okay, that sounds fun. No flags.
Then the sudden “I need to use the bathroom can we stop at your house?”
Okay my house was closest. No flags.
How about all the cars parked on the street in front of my house. You’d think, but no flags.
How about when I saw two of my friends at the bottom of the basement stairs -where our family room was? Still nothing. Well, worse than nothing.
I turned to my friend and said, “I wonder why they’re not going to the dance.”
She looked at me blankly. I realize now that she was waiting for it to HIT. It didn’t. “I wonder why they’re hanging out with my mom, when I’m not here.”
I didn’t figure it all out until I was dragged into the room filled with kids, and I saw a banner that said, Happy Birthday Michaele!
“Oh, I get it now!”
It took the words –in black and white - to get through to me.
That’s what it felt like when I started writing my first novel. “Oh, I get it now!” I only wish it didn’t take so long for me to figure it out. But now, I’m where I want to be in life and I know that 2010 is going to be a roller coaster ride for me. And as much as I hate roller coasters, I will bravely get in the car, and pull down the lap bar. Then as I look to the car ahead and the car behind, I see that I’ve got family and friends who are ready to take the ride with me.